'He won't hurt you,' Kim thought as her dad raged at her. But for the first time, she was terrified of him -- not for him.

Jack's carefully controlled anger, always held in check with her, had been let loose. His fingers were digging into her arms. It took all of her self-control not to break down in tears. Sobbing was not the way to show someone you were mature and able to handle any situation.

It was physically painful to hear him scream she only got the job because he wanted to keep her safe. He didn't think she was capable or that she could do her job, no he still saw her as a little girl - his little girl.

She resisted reminding him that CTU wasn't exactly the safest place on earth and that more blood had been spilled inside the building than probably in most field operations. Other angry, vicious words slipped into her mind but she couldn't say them, afraid of his reaction.

After all, if anyone knew about what could go wrong in undercover operations, it was her.

She chose the least inflammatory of her words and phrased them in a way that he had to accept if not understand.

"I took this job because I wanted it," she whispered, "not because you wanted me here," and pushed him away.

She looked at his face and knew that all the anger had been drained away, replaced by an emotion she couldn't quite identify.

It would be so easy to tell him that she felt he had put her there so he could use her when he had to and control her life when not completely abandoning her. But looking into his eyes she knew that wasn't the truth. Instead, she partly validated his feelings and continued with her side of the debate.

Distantly it occured to her that if she'd been having this argument with anyone else, he'd probably be proud of her.

"This is my job. Better yet, my duty," she countered, the same argument he'd used so many times in the past. After all, wasn't he willing to die time and time again? Didn't she practically beg him not to go undercover with the Salazars and didn't he just tell her that it was his job and his duty and a whole bunch of other things as he packed and left?

A lifetime of worrying about him. But she was afraid and angry and frustrated and she felt tears slipping down her face and couldn't stop them.

"But I'm doing it," she finished, putting her hand up and for once she was the one to turn away, to leave first, covering her mouth with her hand and hoping and praying that she wouldn't break down in front of him. She knew if she looked at that worried hurt expression on his face anymore, her resolve would weaken. And she and millions of lives could not afford that. For once, she was needed.

She leaned slightly against the glass wall for support and waited for her heart to stop racing.

"Can we continue this now?" Tony asked, stepping back into the room.

Her dad nodded slightly and turned around. Only when she was sure he wasn't looking did she watch him leave with her peripheral vision.

"Let's do this," she said, breathing in and out trying to calm herself. She sat back down, silently grateful that at least someone was willing to treat her as a colleague, not a helpless creature needing protection.

If Tony noticed the slight shaking of her hands or her newly bloodshot eyes, he didn't say anything.

Everyone was dealing with their own trauma.

He did open his mouth, maybe to apologize or to give her advice or explain but then shook his head and motioned for the meeting to continue.

Kim forced herself to focus on the information. There would be time enough to deal with everything later.

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